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The following was reported to have happened in the small town of Ingomar, Montana, population 14, on Christmas Eve, 2015. The Jersey Lilly was shutting down for the night. The town was pretty lit up with twinkling lights of every conceivable color… all the way from the Jersey, to the corrals and out on to the plains. Karen was visiting from Lewistown and Coleen and Pam had dropped in from Melstone. To this day, no one is sure how it all began, but it sure did.
‘Twas the Night Before Christmas, Ingomar Style
OR The Ingomar Christmas Light Incident
‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the town,
Lights twinkled and blinkled. They were hung all around.
The ladies had done it, Coleen, Patty and June
On a snow-covered night by the light of the moon.
Karen, Mae and Alice jumped into the fray.
It wouldn’t be dark this fine night, by the way.
Owen Badgett had helped, even though he’s a Grinch;
He’d strung hundreds of lights by the foot and the inch.
He’d been talked into helping, or ordered by Patty.
By now all those ladies had driven him batty.
He snuck off with a headache, a reaction to lights,
And the town settled in, enjoying the night.
When out at the Jersey there arose such a clatter,
Ladies sprang from their beds to see what was the matter.
When what to their wondering eyes should appear, but Santa’s red sleigh,
And a fine team of reindeer.
Dasher and Donner and Comet and Blitzen were tangled in lights,
And needed some fixin’
They were backwards and forwards. It was quite a wreck.
And Santa was stuck in his sleigh. ”What the heck?”
“The nice thing,” thought Karen, who was visiting the place,
“Is that you can probably see Santa all the way out in Space.”
It was quite a scene, a Christmas-time gaffe,
Alice couldn’t help it, she started to laugh.
She started to chuckle and just couldn’t stop.
Alice had taken it over the top.
Folks were stunned for a moment, as you can most likely guess,
Then Patty took over to sort out the mess.
June made the cider, heated up for the group,
And Mae took some light strings and built her a loop.
Mae gathered those reindeer like the teamster she was,
And Pam and Coleen started working on Claus.
.
They tugged him and pulled him and there was a pop.
Finally Santa was free and the gals didn’t stop.
They fed him some cider, and smoothed out his beard.
Christmas would happen, not as they’d feared.
They’d all learned a lesson as Santa took flight.
Lights should be a bit subtle on Christmas eve night.
A deep sigh was heard, as Santa went on his way.
The reindeer built to the night and carried that sleigh.
They heard Santa exclaim as he drove out of sight,
“Merry Christmas to All, and to All a Good Night.”
Ho, Ho, ho
(Alice laughs then fades out…)
Illustration by Andy Atkins